Every time I see a smile on someone’s face, I smile too. It is infectious. And I think to myself, that one must be having a good day, or something good is happening to them, or they remembered a joke they had missed, or they just had a shag, or they saw another smile, or hell yeah they just killed someone. Well, there are no limits for my thoughts.
Today I met with this person who makes me smile every other time I meet with her. I have never spoken to her because we meet at awkward places. Those weird corners that you cannot stop to have a conversation. I hurrying to escape from the blazing heat of the sun, her cutting (sic) those corners in great speed as if going to put out some fire. But we always exchange unspoken greetings, one or two nods like the Agama lizard. Maybe I am afraid speak to her because she wears ‘ i-will-cut-you-up-and- eat-you’ look. She is always in a hurry and immersed in loud song from her radio or phone strapped on the passenger seat of her bicycle, singing along or whistling. Her bicycle is those long high models, maybe it is a Black Mamba. But it serves her well, or so I think, by the way she eats (sic) those corners in high speed like Chris Froome.One day when I speak to her, maybe I should ask her to join Tour de France or a similar competition.
When I met her today, we exchanged our usual, and a smile emblazoned on my face. Then my mind was at it again. This mind of mine… Every time I see her on the bicycle, pedaling away, I am reminded of the sequel Gods must be crazy. The entire movie cracks me up. I have listed it on my to-watch list for when I need a good laugh. It precedes Sex and the City series and movie, that slaps me awake in the face of gal issues ( okay I don’t think I have such a list, but I should come up with one).
Now there is this part in the second movie or sequel of Gods must be crazy that is about this guy who rides a bicycle. I think it is amongst my many LOL parts. I am tickled whenever i remember it. Now every time I see my lady on the bicycle, my mind reels back to that scene. I can’t help smiling every time I meet her. Maybe the gods aren’t crazy, someone is.
My affair with the books was worthwhile. But I am left with a lot of mixed feelings. I do not know if it is guilt i feel for Iya Segi, Iya Tope and Iya Femi ( first three wives of Baba Segi) that their past dark secrets have come to light, or grief for Iya Segi for killing her own daughter, or sympathy for Baba Segi and Bolanle ( fourth wife of Baba Segi) for what they had to go through.
We all have our secrets tightly held in the darkest parts of our hearts. They make us feel shameful, unworthy of who we are or what we have. They cloud our judgment as we always try to keep them hidden in the dungeons of heart. We end up lying endlessly and hurting our loved ones because we are just afraid. Worried of what they and others will perceive of us. Worried that we will not be loved or not be likable anymore. But what if? What if what we worry about does not happen?
We always fear that our journey will never be understood. Not everyone will understand it anyway but there are those who will. So we shouldn’t be afraid to tell our stories. Those who love you will love you even with the many scars and mistakes you have made. Until we have seen someone’s darkness we don’t really know who they are. Until we have forgiven someone’s darkness, we don’t really know what love is (Marianne Williamson).
Baba Segi’s life and that of his wives has secrets that threaten to destroy them and almost does. But it takes the kindness and fortitude of Bolanle , struggling with her own dark past to help erase the shame and fear brought about by the secrets in Baba Segi’s household.
The secret lives of Baba Segi’s wives is a book laden with humor. Very relatable to our daily lives ( what your daily life may be). Makes you think of all the secrets you keep or have been kept from you, and what the right thing is to do.